STICKS AND STONES

For all that Ben has had to adjust to, we are very proud of how amazing he is doing with it all.  For the most part, he is a bright and happy little boy who seems to really enjoy his new life in his new country and family!

However, one area that continues to be a struggle for him is in the area of play.  Ben just doesn't know what to do with toys most of the time.  Jonah will be busy playing with his blocks, Little People, etc, and I will often find Ben just laying around sucking his thumb and waving some object in front of his face.  When I try to encourage him to play (and I confess, sometimes it feels more like force), he often gets angry at me.  But I think the anger is really more confusion- he just doesn't know what I am asking him to do.  Creativity and imagination are not part of his repertoire yet.  I am seeing some progress in the area thanks to his wonderful role model Jonah!  But it is definitely still in process.

That being said, outdoor play is much easier for Ben. I think this is because his orphanage schedule was 2 hours of play outside in the morning and afternoon.  And the thing about Ben playing outside is he doesn't really need toys to occupy himself outside.  Not to sound "orphany" (I know this isn't a word), but he really just loves to play with sticks and stones (and dirt and grass).  He can keep himself busy just wandering around our yard.  This is where I see the most creativity and imagination in Ben. 

Does this make me happy?  Of course, I think a child's imagination is one of the most beautiful things about childhood.  I like watching Ben have fun and play rather than lay there and stim with a object in front of his face.  

However, there is a part of me that is sad that sticks and stones are all this boy ever really had to play with.  I am not advocating that kids need toys to be happy, but I feel sad that Ben's life was so empty of what most kids just take for granted.  I wish Ben would have had a family that surrounded and filled his life with love and attention from the very moment of his birth instead of being left at the hospital because there was such a fear of his Down syndrome.  I am sad that his birth parents missed out on having this precious boy in their lives.  I am sure they feel a loss and sadness that I can't even imagine because of leaving him that day.  

We are making up for so much lost time.  I want to give him so much so seeing him most happy with stick and stones is a bit humbling.  Not bad, just humbling.  

Here are some photos from our walk on Sunday- the boys had so much fun playing with....you guessed it sticks and stones!